FLASH FICTION STORY- Barbed wire summer

Link in the picture


Through the steam pouring from my busted radiator I catch sight of the barbed wire.
I close my eyes and see sweat slickened muscles, dig and plant, string and staple.
The summer help running fence, as I watch from the cool water of the pond.
Leaving playmates behind I step to join him.
He is not surprised.

Another post sinks into deep rich soil.
I gasp in shock as barbed points break skin.
Pleasure and pain combine.
Head thrown back I call out to the sky.
The sun burns.
I look at scarred arms and smile.
The tow truck driver has just arrived.

Categories: Flash Fiction Friday | 51 Comments

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51 thoughts on “FLASH FICTION STORY- Barbed wire summer

  1. Shelia

    Good details! I could see the pond, fence, and almost smell the Pond water as I read it!!!!:) u r doing great!!!!!:0)

  2. Shelia

    Wasn’t done! Hahaha!!! The sound and smell of a busted radiator and the feeling of barbed wire Manning through the skin is something I know too well. U took me back to sounds, smells, and the feelings of those things! Great job!!!!!”:)

  3. Thanks! You remember those summers!

  4. Lora Mitchell

    I recall those summers … remember watching the farmers in town doing the very same…fencing in their live stock…yes, some with barbed wire. Nice memories…nice take on the prompt. Here’s mine:

  5. I saw, smelled and felt. Nice work.

  6. EmmaMc

    Lovely memories here and just what I need on a rainy morning in the UK. I love these lines

    Another post sinks into deep rich soil.
    I gasp in shock as barbed points break skin.
    Pleasure and pain combine.


  7. I see you there! Great word picture. Here is mine http://oldentimes.wordpress.com/2012/04/27/hog-tight-it-endures/

  8. Full of great imagery and immersive smells and feelings. Very nice.


  9. I thought this was a beautiful recollection, and was it my imagination, or were there some pretty strong metaphors in this piece? Either way, the more I read it, the more I loved it.


  10. I seem to have read something into this that others might not have. Cold shower I think … Nice piece of work, had to read it a couple of times to savour it.

    Mine’s at: http://castelsarrasin.wordpress.com/2012/04/27/trespass/

  11. Interesting post. Enigmatic. Thank God the tow truck driver showed up!


  12. This has a poetic flow with a strong sense of imagery. Here is mine:

  13. You took me with you. I was right there. Well done.

    Here’s mine: http://thebradleychronicles.wordpress.com/

  14. An exceptionally vivid tale full of imagery and sensation. I agree that one can appreciate every aspect described in reality. Bravo!

  15. TheOthers1

    Did an excellent job telling this. Made it much easier to picture the moment.

    My attempt: http://unduecreativity.wordpress.com/2012/04/26/sharp/

  16. She had some nice memories to reflect on while waiting on a car repair. I think you captured it well in very few words.

    Thanks for stopping by mine.


  17. The truck driver coming in was a bit of a let down for her, I think. Unless he’s all muscley with a hard post of his own!! I liked the imagery you gave us and the subtle but effective introduction of the metaphorical element. Nicely done.
    I’m over here: http://elmowrites.wordpress.com/2012/04/27/friday-fiction-soul-memories/

  18. I liked the line, “Another post sinks into deep rich soil”. Great job evoking the image for us!

    This story is like a simplistic snapshot description of some mediocre task that manage to breathe life into for me, and I enjoyed it.

  19. I loved it, but for me it was more about the overlaid memory, the double meaning which you may or may not have intended there. Cold shower is right!! Whew, you can evoke a mood! Nice job.

    Mine’s here: http://bit.ly/I78fA3

  20. Very romantic, loved the imagery. good job

  21. Madison Woods

    I’m afraid I might have seen more than you intended, too – because what I saw was her losing her virginity to a farmer’s hand in that memory. And a very good memory it seemed to be 😉

  22. This piece was brilliant, esp. Another post sinks into deep rich soil.
    I gasp in shock as barbed points break skin.
    I’m with Madison 100% – great double meaning! I got it right away – guess that’s how my mind works!

    Here’s mine: http://postcardfiction.com/2012/04/27/scraped/

  23. OOOOHOHHHHHH! Okay, I admit a glimpsed the comments to get it. But then I re-read it. Awesome mirror stories going on there. Well-written, too.
    : )
    Mine at: http://the-drabbler.com/trespass/

  24. The flashback works nicely and with just enough suggestion. ‘Head thrown back I call out to the sky’ says it all. Well done.

  25. John Hardy Bell

    This is the first I’m reading of your work, and I really, really enjoyed it. I have to admit, I had to read it twice, but after that second reading it really sunk in. You managed to conjure up so many details, so many images, so many moods in 100 words. I can tell that a lot went into create this piece, and it is SKILLFULLY executed! Well done, Amanda.

    Here is my story: http://wp.me/pReXn-fv

    • Wow Thank you! Actually between me &you I couldn’t come with anything all week. Friday I looked at it one last time and had an “Ah ha” moment typed it up and submitted it.

  26. fantastic details and imagery!

  27. It’s wonderful that so many have joined our FridayFictioneers but I have to say that — when you’re on the tail-end of the comments– everyone has expressed most of my thoughts. Wonderful piece–I enjoyed it and agree with all that’s been said. 🙂

    Thanks for visiting and commenting on mine.

  28. that might be a “post,” but it sure wasn’t “soil” it was buried in.

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